Well i noticed that in my first two drafts i included a lot of things so what i will do is take out some parts that are not that important and i will add parts in that are more import like were my husband left to go. I even did not include telling i have a lot of showing because when i was writing the essay i was a little unclear on what telling and showing was and i thought that what i was doing was wrong. But when the teacher look over my draft he actually told me that i was doing way more showing and no telling at all so with the finally draft i will try to take out some showing parts and add in a few telling scenes just to get to the point fast because with showing you are taking a longer time getting to the point and people will start to get bored of reading because it is taking to long to get the point across.Other than the problems that i just pointed out i believe that my finally draft is going to be good.
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April 2015
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